QANA again..

i woke up this morning on the most devastated pictures i ever saw.. another massacre in Qana ..another one ..

27 children died..

they were hiding with their families in a building .. and what a coincidence; the israeli bombs hit them .. killing more than 55 persons including these babies.. i couldn`t hold my tears .. and i`m speechless now ..

if the tears and prayers could end this war ,, i will not stop crying ..and praying .. but what is happening in this world makes me feel so frustrated..

but still i will pray for them .. for these children ..our children .. for lebanon ..

i`m soo sad today feeling that those children lost their life ..simply because they are lebanese..may god rest their souls ..

i don`t know if this could help .. but i`m fasting tomorrow and i will spend the whole day praying and reading Quraan for the souls of the victims ..i heard somewhere that alot of muslims are doing the same tomorrow so i decided to follow..and i hope that everybody could do the same .. i know that we should pray everyday ,, but at least this will make us feel that we are sort of usefull although by fasting and praying

i was determined NOT to talk about the war in Lebanon .. as i felt that i will not add anything .. but today i couldn`t resist ..

will you fast with me tomorrow

it is only one day just to feel the sufference of our brothers there ..

thank you

Dania`s mama

HARRY POTTER

Harry potter .. this magical story of a young wizard who is chased by lord voldermort (the bad guy!!) .. I just like this beautiful story full of magic and mystery .. yes.. I know that it is originally created for children but I must admit : I adore this harry and his school , his friends , the headmaster ,, simply everything is fascinating me ..
since I was a child .. I was always amazed by stories of witches ,, and as my mum always say ; I had this great imagination that I could invent a full story about this beautiful princess who was cursed by the bad evil witch and bla..bla..bla..
it was not only imagination and creations .. I used to draw the characters ,, write the lines for them (their dialogues) and I just fill these pages till I reached the end (which is usually a happy ending!).. this is how I used to play (i was a shy girl and a very very quiet child) .. i used to spend the entire evening inventing , painting , and changing the story till I feel satisfied .. and that`s it ..
over the years and because we used to travel too much .. I lost most of my paintings , and of course all my stories .. but I`m still remembering those lovely evenings .. with all those papers and colours around me ,, and only my imagination to begin..
well .. maybe ,, because of these shadowing memories of a childhood that I missed too much ,, that is why I grabbed the first book of harry potter with enthusiasm ,, I remember taking the book with me to my clinic and just read it whenever I could (between appointments ,, after pulling some teeth ,, whatever!!!) and since then I became addicted to it .. I bought the second one.. the third one .. the fourth .. then I bought the DVD`s ,, then the fifth book ,, and the sixth one .. now i`m waiting for the seventh to be finished (sadly this will be the last one).
these days I`m re-reading the forth book (`cause I recently saw the movie: Harry Potter and the goblet of fire) .. so I felt that I would like to read it again .. to see what did they cut and what did they add ,, and most of all .. I would like to revive the characters ,, the story..
it is addiction signs.. I know !! ..but believe me .. it worth it .. I praise the writer for her wonderful work.. and I will save the books for Dania to read when she grow up ..
it is a story of love and devotion .. full of magic and mystery..and beyond.
I just like it

Dania`s mama

I LIKE TRIPOLI... at night !

Al Saraya Al Hamra in Tripoli

yes.. Tripoli is beautiful at night especially the harbor area and the down town .. the streets are soo bright .. the sea is crystal clear ... as if the stars had fallen into its water .. the weather is warm with some breezing air that pass by your cheeks to give you this wonderful feeling of happiness and peace ..

through the day ,, it is another story ,, terrible traffic and horrible drivers ,, millions of cars everywhere.. bad weather with heat and humidity .. people with long faces , ready for any problem to blow their anger off..

to make it short ,, it`s a big mistake to go out (unless you have something urgent to do , like work or stuff ) during the day hours in the summer period ..

since I came back I took it as a rule to go out only at night (after nine o`click) ,, but I noticed something ; the traffic is bad till midnight ,,but at least there is alot of families around you and this is good for us women ...as it gives us more freedom to drive cars during the night , and i take this as an advantage ,, women here can go everywhere , anytime because it is simply safe to do so...

me and mama are soo busy these days(shopping and preparations for my brother Fat7a and engagement party) ,, so we have to go out everyday( i mean everynight!!!) to buy stuff and to do the bookings and reservations and bla..bla..bla..bla..

people in the shops have a very funny answer when you ask about the availability of something that you realy need and you still don`t find ,, this answer is ( insha`allah after ten days !!!) everything is coming after ten days ,, and you come after these ten days to hear the same word ,, well we are waiting for these ten days to finish so we can get what we want !!!

daddy .. we missed you ,, Dania called one of her toys here "baba".. i think she is trying to express herself .. she is trying to say that she missed you.. she missed her playmate ..

but don`t worry ,, she is doing fine ,, playing all the time ,, having fun ,, happy with all the kids here.. it will be hard for me to take her back to our quiet enviroment.. we `ll see

take care daddy .. and have fun..

and by the way i fixed the problem of the photos (as you can see !)

bye for now

Dania `s mama

HEY ...I`m in Libya

well .. we arrived on the 14th of July to my family house after a long trip .. started from 3:00 AM when we woke up and got ready to go to the airport ,, the taxi came at 4:00 AM (already sun shine morning there!!) we arrived to the airport at 4:20 .. checked in and went to the nearest table to take some coffee and wait till it`s time to go .. Abubaker didn`t sleep at all..so at that point; his eyes were getting smaller.. although he refused to go untill we go to the gate ,, Dania was doing great ,, very excited of the new atmosphere ,, there were alot of children playing ,, she was soooo excited,, then we just hugged daddy goodbye and take care ,, and we went to the gate ,, and suddenly..!!! BATATAAAAAAA.... dania was pointing at one point and shouting "crisps" in arabic .. there was a box full of chocolates and crips ,, and she was crying for one of these crisps AT 5:30 IN THE MORNING ... I was sooo embaraced putting the coin in the machine and grapping the crisps and handing it to my little lady.. but what can i do !!!
the plane from Newcastle to London was so smooth ,, Dania slept immediatly ,, we arrived to heathrow at 7:00 ,, and i had like two hours and half before the other plane .. so i checked the place to know where are the gates for international flights and Dania discovered a play ground she turned her lovely face towards me and with a look of an angel(which she is soo good to do !) she asked me politely to go there : Mema (my name ) please .. emshu nel3abu(go to play!!!!)
i couldn`t say no.. i took her to the place and she started to play with joy ,, these children are realy angels of god ,, there were at least 6 nationalities in that place all speaking their own native languages (including dania ) and yet they can communicate easily ,, they were following each other laughing and giggling ,, jumping and running ,, Dania was over the moon (i think she thought that we took the plane to come to this place !!!) ,, there was a portugese boy who played with Dania alot and took good care of her .. yes!! ,, she was playing in a small (plane like) game when she suddenly lost control .. so when i jumped to grap her before falling on the ground ,, i found the boy beside her trying to show her what to do so she can climb the plane again and she refused to take my hand , instead she tried to repeat what the boy instructed her(in portugese!!!)and she did it .. !!!
the plane of the portugese family was before ours ,, so we had to say bye to the lovely boy ,, and it was easy for me to take dania away from the place to go to bye some chocolates and to see the duty free of heathrow ..
i met my brother`s fiance` with her mum in the airport ,, we chatted for a while before heading to the gate .. then we took our seats in the plane ,, and my lovely dania(she was so lovely and quite throughout the jouirney) she slept at once ,, but there was alot of children in the plane that i couldn`t close my eyes ,, babies crying ,, toddlers singing and shouting.. it was a mess ,, i couldn`t even eat (the food was terrible) ... so when we arrived and after the big hugs,hellos and miss yous and ..and.. i went to my bedroom to catch some sleep ,, but may be because of the excitment to be at my family`s home and being with my mum, dad , sister and brothers ,, that i couldn`t sleep at all ,, so i went down to the living room to join them ..
Dania was so happy to see mum especially ,, (Dania calls my mum mama) they are inseparable since then.. she is now sleeping with her ,,
i went to see my inlaws yesterday , they were soo happy to see dania ,, and i felt that Abubaker`s mum was hiding her tears when she was kissing dania ,, she was alone at home ,, she told me about how much she missed her son ,, Abubaker is so good with his parents ,, when we were in Libya he was visiting his parents house everyday ,,
well.. that`s it for now ,,
bye

ITALIA WON!!!

WAW !!! what a big day , Italia won the world cup ,, they are the champions of the world ,,I can`t believe myself ,, I supported them with all my heart ,, they deserve the cup ,, yeah! they are the best ,,
I received alot of calls from everywhere congratulating me .. I was speechless ,, when they score their victory goal we all screamed and screamed ,, Dania was so excited running around us and screaming as well ,, (since then she is always singing the "we are the champions " song with her hands up high !!!!).

the next day our computer was stuck (I think it is because of me as I downloaded an antivirous program .. yeah.. me .. the computer expert!!!) ,, well my husband took it to his friend who is a computer REAL expert and had to leave it with him for two long days ,,,

it was as if you sent your own child away from home ,, I think that me and Abubaker became addicted to the virtual world of Internet ,, those two days were the longest days ever..

we had it back yesterday and what a relief ,, it became faster and better .. I would really like to know how people lived before Internet!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I cleaned the house yesterday (big cleaning!!) ,, I know that my husband is a cleaning freak!! but I must leave everything nice and tidy !! ,, I`m doing the laundry now ,,I will go to the gym in an hour for my daily training and to take the instructions from my trainer on what to do during these two months away from my local gym .. I already told her that we had pretty good gyms there in libya but i can`t attend it everyday because they open only three days a week for women ,, well ,, my trainer was thrilled to hear that because she was trying hard with me to use the gym only three times per week but i insisted to come on a daily basis ..

my family are realy busy these days with the preparations for my brother engagement ceremony ,, I hope that I could be of good help when I go there,,

tomorrow my flight (to london) will be at 6 o`clock and that means that i will wake up at 4 o`clock .. then the next flight (to libya) will be 9:30 and we will arrive (in sha`allah) at 14:00 to tripoli.

I like airports and flights and duty free`s ,,I like to see people carrying their bags and heading to various destinations ,, the airport for me is like a small world ,, oh and I enjoy hearing the announcements of the flights coming and going ,, and everything related to airports ,,

well.. i hope everything goes smoothly till we reach my lovely family house..

i can`t wait to see u mum and dad ,, kisses to you dody .. and big hugs to Aladdin and Ghassan.

bye

packing!!!

I`m packing ,, yes ! going to visit my family in Libya ,, we have a special occasion there : my brother`s engagement party ,, I bought two bags the other day for me and Dania (you know alot of clothes and shoes ,, to show off there!! hahaha!!).
I finished my shopping (with no money left for the rest of the month... ooops!!!!) the problem is when i checked back what i bought i felt so disappointed and shocked ,, i spent almost all my money and i still need a hundred of things which for my opinion are soooo important!!( I know it is -women- ever- problem- : never satisfied!!),, well thanks god for everything ,, and after all I`m going to my family house so I don`t think I will need anything with my mum spoiling us all the time .. yes my mum has a weakness towards us she never refused any thing we asked ( and yes we always take advantage of that!!) so if I need any thing there I` sure she will not refuse !!(I`m a mean girl!!!).
my brother is engaged to a beautiful girl ,, when I first met her I was like -oh my god- she is georgous !!!,, she is so young but her way of thinking and how she expresses herself made me feel as if I`m with a mature intellectual woman ,, I like it when a woman is combining the beauty with culture and knowledge.. we as a family are so happy to have her as a new member ..
my mother and sister are doing all the preparations there in Libya and believe me it is a headache to prepare for events in libya ,, you must be in control of everything and never trust the promises made by the people you are dealing with ,, you must check and check and check .. as for buying things ,, well this is another issue ,, although we have some good shops and boutiques full with italian clothes and stuff ,, but yet there is no variety of styles and stuff ,, well to make a long story short ,, it is a compelte headache to get prepared for any event there..
well.. I will arrive on the 14th of this month (next friday) my plane from here will take off at 6 o`clock which means we will wake at 4 o`clock in the morning !!,, then a transit in heathrow for two hours aand half ,, and we will arrive in my country at 14:00.
long journey but it worht it ,, I missed my family too much .. I missed our "breakfast" chatting around the kitchen table .. our evening conversations about almost everything ,, and our "let`s go around the city"`s every thursday..
we will leave abubaker here alone ,, he is concerned about how to do alone ( well I don`t think it is a problem to have some free time away from family and duties !! but he is insisting that he will get bored !!!),, yesterday evening he was playing with Dania and suddenly he sighed and said that he is gonna miss her (and me of course!!) ,, yes in these few months we were so close like never before ,, when we where in my country we were like roommates!! i have my own car and he has his own one ,, i have my work and my family and social duties and he has his .. even when we go together to any event; we had to be separated because women and men don`t meet in typical libyan occasions!!
in result ,, I was used to do everything alone ,, when we think of going out for dinner or something; it is always like mission impossible `cause we must swipe away all bad ideas from the staring people`s heads and convinced them that we are a typical libyan married couple (and this is simply done my expressing some long faces and never never NEVER hold eachother hands!!!)
but here ,, we are together all the time with no commitments or duties just the three of us all the time ,, we like it although it is boring sometimes!! ,, but i think it is a precious thing that we achieved here..
back to my preparations .. Abubaker is concerned about me being alone with Dania ,, i used to travel by my own ,, but with this little monster ,, yes ,, i`m concerned too !! but I know I will manage ,,
Abubaker has always this father figure with all his concerns and doubts ,, sometimes it frustrates me ,, but I`m getting used to it ..
we are gonna miss him ,, but I think it will be a great opportunity to explore the city (and even other cities if he wants) as he will have more free time especially with the wonderful weather these days,,
by the way my bags are RED in colour ,,,, mmmmm!!! well it will be easier to recognize them don`t you think!!!!

Dania`s mother

Dania supporting her favourate teams

AUGURI ITALIA!!!!

I`m so thrilled right now .. thay made it ,, they won the game ,,, oaaaaaaaaah!!! it was a hard day for me .. i couldn`t see the match (I have a soft heart!!!),, but on the final 5 minutes of the additional time i came back to the living room waiting for the game to end and for the penalties to start ,,I was discussing the efficiency of the Italian goal keeper ,, and suddenly!!!!!!!!! they score and we jumped .. waaaw!! then the second one came !! oh my god ,, we screamed and yelled ,, I got a call from dad ,, he was singing and shouting with joy: we will take it!! "la coppa e nostra!!"(the cup is ours!!) ..
Abubaker called his friend who is a big fan of the Italians ,, he told us that the Libyans are in hte streets celebrating ,,
then my aunt called from Italy ,, she said there were fire works everywhere !! she lost her voice out of joy ,,
what a day!! I`m so happy right now ,, hoping to see them in the final game holding the cup ,, we need some celebrations !!
I noticed that I mostly write about the football and the world cup ,, well it is a temporary period as this is the main topic these days ,, even when I call my mum, I spend most of the call time chatting about the world cup ,, I guess this is what you get when you`re married to a "football lunatic"!!! sorry hubby.

Dania`s Mother

OH MY GOODNESS!!!

Argentina lost!!!!!!!!!.. yesterday was one of my husband`s worst days of his life .. I never saw him in this situation ,, when they lost he was like a statue ,, stunned and shocked ,,i must say that I was soooo disappointed they were the best team in this tournament ,, well after all ; football is all about art and luck (and some under-table bloody games of FIFA leaders!!)..
but later on I was so relieved that the Italians has made it .. they won after I almost got a heart attack ,, but they did it !! yeeees !! ....."FORSA ITALIA!!!" ..
Dania was just running around us shouting "talia..talia!!!" she is so happy these days that she got two crasy parents who are screaming and singing all the time in front of the TV .. well !! because of a "ball"!!!!
But... today England lost ,, it was a great shock ,,when it was over; the commentators at BBC TV were hiding their tears(actually one of them was already crying ),, there was this feeling of sadness and emptiness ,, we felt sad for them ,, later on I went to my local gym (yes!! trying to loose some weight!!) and the first thing i saw was an angry supporter who was pulling England flags off his car,, and when the Metro arrived nearby; i saw lots of fans getting off the train crying and holding each other,, and when I entered the gym ,, ooops!! it was deserted ,, people are in the lobby arguing and shouting ,,nobody in the gym area!!!!
how emotional and heartbreaking is this sport,, one minute you are the champion ,next minute you`re going home empty handed..
my mum loves football too much ,, actually she is the only one who understand it ,, the rest (my two brothers and my younger sister and even dad) doesn`t realy care about football unless it is world cup.. we usually get crazy!! and we all support Italia,,
I really miss these feelings and the crazy things we usually do during the tournament ,, but thanks god that we have internet , satellite and mobiles ,, connection is easier now .. but nothing replaces the physical connections and touches..
well I guess I`m over excited and emotional because of this tournament,,
by the way the FRENCH defeated Brazil ,, I love france ,,especially Zedan and Henry.. they are amazing.. ahhhhhhh!!! at least something to smile for!!!!